A friend lamented recently that a longtime pal has become fixated on anger. “It feels like she starts every sentence with ‘I’m so angry.’ I’m sorry to say this, but I don’t enjoy being around her anymore.”

I was nodding as she was telling me this story. More people I know, especially social media friends, seem to be wallowing in rage these days. It’s as though they relish being continuously pissed off.

The other day my phone alerted me to a lengthy rant from “menopausal women” who are livid, not about the cessation of their periods or hot flashes, but about politics. It didn’t seem they were going to have a moment’s peace until they convinced the rest of us how bad things are.

Okay, so I’ve been there. When I was in my thirties and forties and full of female “testosterone,” the slightest thing would set me off. On the highway, I was in a perpetual state of road rage. Every other driver was stupid. If my newspaper competition got a story before I did, I walked around in a blue funk. My blood pressure entered the red zone and stayed there all day. I could spit nails with the best of them.

Then one day I realized, the only one my anger was hurting was me. I still grumble when someone weaves in and out of traffic only to arrive at the stoplight the same time as me. My blood pressure still nudges upward when I hear that my church is planning to remodel a recent remodel because it wasn’t done correctly the first time.

And, yes, Donald Trump does things that irritate and annoy me. But so do most politicians.

But instead of endless raging on social media, I try to channel my negative energy into something positive. Like working at the church to raise money for local charities. Or playing a fun game of Mahjongg (no drama please) with a group of ladies I’ve known for years. Or writing.

The constructive ways we can re-direct our feelings of hate and loathing are endless, starting with doing something for others—like helping out at a local food bank or volunteering at the humane society. There’s plenty of trash to be cleaned up along the roadways and waterways. The local library and many schools are eager for helpers. Pay it forward at McDonald’s or the grocery story. Why sit around all day simmering and lecturing when you could be making a real difference?

Anger is definitely personal, so if you want to work yourself into a frenzy every time you see or hear something you don’t agree with, that’s your choice. Just don’t try to drag me down with you. I’ve got better things to do.